36 Essential Life Lessons I Wish I Knew Sooner
To celebrate my 36 birthday I’m sharing 36 life lessons I wish I knew sooner.
The universe has been conspiring for 13.8 billion years to deliver you as a gift. Let the world experience this once in a lifetime gift.
Deep reflection of my failures and most challenging times allowed me to see the tremendous lessons they provided. Your darkest moments can provide the greatest light if you’re willing to face them. Always ask, What can I learn from this moment?
In ten years, you will look in the mirror, and someone will stare back. That person will be shaped by the thoughts and actions of today. The life you have is a reflection of what you think and do. What you think is what you become. Think beautiful and great thoughts and then follow those up with the actions that align with them and that’s what you’ll become.
Mapping out the vision you have for your life and who you want to become is a game changer. Two questions that have helped with this,
What’s worth doing even if I fail?
Who do I have to become to achieve all that I want?
There is no speed limit to personal growth. In an instant we can form a new idea, belief or dream that alters our life forever. Once you realize there are no speed limits, only plateaus, you can step on the gas as hard as possible because that fuel source never runs out.
Life is not a problem to be solved or a destination to be reached, it’s an unfolding dance that’s to be enjoyed every step along the way.
The highest life you can live is when every single moment that comes before you is better off because it did. Serve the present moment with all your heart and soul. Imagine what the world would be like if everyone did that. Take responsibility for the beauty of the world.
If you’re serious about your growth and development, you must first accept full responsibility for your life. Don’t waste energy blaming others for circumstances or outcomes. The moment you commit to full responsibility everything changes. This means taking responsibility for your circumstances, your decisions, and your life. It is only when we take on this responsibility that we can truly begin to move forward. We must be the captains of our own ships, the CEOs of You Inc, and the ones in charge. This is the only path to unlocking greater potential.
It’s all a story. Everything… Our life is a story we tell ourselves. Every experience is colored by our own interpretation. And guess what, if the story is not serving us, we have the power to change the narrative. So if we don’t like the story we’re telling, we have the power to rewrite it. Take ownership of your narrative and craft a story that serves you.
You have to live a life that, if everyone lived it, there would be peace. If you can’t do that, you are part of the problem, not the solution.
Find the people, places and things that light up your soul and then focus your time, energy and attention on them. Stop wasting your limited time on this earth on people, places and things that don’t make you feel fully alive. Invest your time in those that do—those that light up your soul.
In our encounters with the edges, we come to know ourselves more deeply. Run towards your edges and then leap off the cliff. When you do that what you discover is you had wings all along and you were meant to fly…
Life is a mysterious balance of paradoxes. The struggles and joys, the darkness and light, the death and rebirth – these are the essential components of our paths. Without the pain, pleasure would be bland. Without the darkness, we wouldn’t be able to appreciate the light. Without death, there would be no new life. This is the cycle of life.
Joy isn’t a feeling, it can be an outlook on life. Joy is an attitude we can choose to live by, rather than a feeling that comes and goes. When we choose joy, we can make it part of our lives, no matter what is happening around us. Joy is a powerful decision, and we all have the power to make it.
Beauty, it’s of no extrinsic value but the internal value it brings is immeasurable… Beauty is all around us if we’re willing to look. Not the beauty we’re sold in magazines and on billboards. But the beauty of nature. The beauty of love. The beauty of the world. Seek it. Cultivate it. Fill your life with it.
You can be the creator of your own energy. Energy is going to come from somewhere. We can allow it to either come from outside of us or create it internally. No longer do you have to be negatively influenced by the energy coming at you from the external world. Don’t believe me? Remember a time when you were around someone who usually sucks the life out of a room and you decided not to allow them to ruin your experience and you created the internal energy to feel your best? See, we have the power to never allow the negative energy of the external to create the energy we have internally.
Redirecting your negative thoughts is one of the greatest skills you can develop. We allow one negative thought to lead to another and before we know it we’re diving head first into the downward spiral. But it doesn’t have to be that way. You can train yourself to become aware of your negative thoughts and as soon as you do redirect yourself to a more empowering thought. Become Aware of your thoughts – take Aim at a more empowering thought- Act on that more empowering thought. Aware -> Aim -> Act
Earned success is one of the keys to a fulfilling life. If you want to taste the richness of true happiness the path is through earned success. Through doing something that pushes you to your limits. Something that challenges you and forces you to dig deep. Something no one else could hand you or do for you. Something that you had to go out and earn for yourself. That brings some of the deepest happiness you can ever experience.
There is a kind way to do everything. A way that has a heart.
Ask yourself:
If this was the last world you said to someone before they died would it have made their final moment better?
If the way you did this was how you did everything into eternity would you be happy?
After all, you never know if this moment will be your last so you might as well not take that chance and choose kindness with every opportunity you get.
Become an expert at making the thing you dream become a reality. Everywhere we look we’re surrounded by the manifestations of someone else’s dream. The clothes we’re wearing, the house we live in, the devices we use—all of them were once someone else’s dream. But you can do the same. You can dream up a beautiful life and live it, create a world-changing business, make a device to help those who are disabled, or produce a work of art that has never been seen before. Today as you embark on this world remember, someone is going to accomplish your dreams… Why not make it you?
Few things are as rewarding than finding your gifts and sharing them. Find what ignites your soul. Find the things that are worthy of your fear and joy and focus. To discover those you need to listen to the quiet whispers. Live deeply on your own inner guidance.
You can do everything right and it still turns out wrong and you can do everything wrong and it still turns out right. The outcome in life isn’t always tied to the quality of your behavior but that doesn’t mean to not give it your best. Ask yourself, Did I give it my best? Let that be your measure of success.
I believe that everyone is doing the best they are capable of in the moment. If I had been born as them and had every single life experience they did, at that moment I would have made the exact some choice or taken the exact same action. Just because I would have done something different doesn’t mean they were capable of doing that. This idea has filled me with a lot more compassion.
The tiniest of actions is always better than the noblest of intentions. Dream big. Start small. Act now.
Two Conversations you should be having every week. The first is with someone you can learn from like a mentor, thought leader or expert in their field. The second is with someone who you can share your struggles, obstacles and be completely honest with. The compounding effect these two have on your life will be incalculable.
The universe is an infinite playground of magical possibilities and we get to live in that playground. There are always more possibilities, they just require imagination.
The best things in life are free but require the most amount of work. Great marriages don’t just happen. Self mastery can’t be bought. A fortified mind and a chiseled body won’t be found on aisle 6 of the grocery store. To be able to call someone an old friend requires decades of work. Put in the work and enjoy the fruits of your labor.
Cherish your mind and your body; it is the only temple your soul will live in during this lifetime. Find time each day to feed them. Learn something, move your body, nourish your soul and laugh uncontrollably.
The real test of character is defined by your actions in your darkest hours. Be the person you want to be; Do the actions consistent with those values; Have whatever comes from those actions.
Never rob someone of hope, it may be all they have left. Never say anything that couldn’t stand as the last thing that’s ever said to someone.
The easiest way to gain happiness is to want the things you already have. Express gratitude for it all. Amor Fati.
Go through this life so you make the eyes shine on everyone you interact with. Let the world feel the power of your gravity. Maximize your humanity. We’re only going through this life but once, so anytime there is an opportunity for you to express kindness or do a good deed, do it now for that opportunity will not present itself again. Simply be an artist making this world more beautiful.
Pause to enjoy the breezes.
After all these years and experiences, you’ll know nothing, nothing at all, that compares to the love for another person when it comes to reaching immensity and infinity. Love conquers all.
You can fail at something you hate doing so you might as well take a chance doing something you love.
Our mind creates the cage that we live in and it has the key to unlock it. Never forget that.
Share the life lessons that have had the greatest impact on you in the comments section!